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I think I swallowed a bit of my tooth today. I guess I should elaborate on that. I went to the hospital today. I thought I was there to schedule an appointment to extract my wisdom teeth, maybe check my teeth out again, take some pictures. So when the staff started acting like they're getting ready for something I was a bit confused. (http://i.imgur.com/vWcTWWU.gif) First of all, I would like to point out that this is a brilliant strategy. Leaving your patients clueless about what will happen to them until five minutes before you start plucking their teeth out is just-- brilliant. I'm not even being sarcastic. Before they have time to protest you'll have a few tubes and five fingers wielding painful looking tools in their mouth. This would work wonders for most patients. Me: Wait just a minute, what? We're doing this today? Surgeon: Umm. Yes. Unless you don't want to. (This sounded way too much like a challenge to me, there was no going back) Me: Okay. How long is this going to take? Turns out it didn't take that long at all. After poking me with needles a handful of times it wasn't ten minutes before the left side of my mouth was wisdom-less. It was... interesting. It felt like he was opening a bottle of wine with a corkscrew. Only my top left wisdom tooth was the cork, the corkscrew was a corkscrew and the wine was blood. Oh, yeah, the blood. I only thought about the blood when I noticed the little tube that was sucking it out of my mouth. Of course there was a lot of blood. I just didn't have time to go through everything that would happen during surgery (over and over, in my head) due to fact I didn't know I was getting my teeth removed today-- BRILLIANT, I TELL YOU! Surgeon: One down. Joana: Meehmas (Well, that was fast) Surgeon: Top one now The left bottom tooth though, now that one was really interesting. There was the corkscrew motion again and this sick, sick CRUUUNCH sound-- the sound of my tooth breaking into pieces, one of which I accidentally swallowed. The stitching was also pretty cool, if you like that sort of thing. I was too mesmerized to pay much attention to it, what with having just swallowed a bit of tooth and all. And just like that it was done. One last look at my top left wisdom molar. I never loved you. I think the bottom left molar wasn't in any condition to have an open casket so there was no goodbye. Surgeon: We're good. Me: Mhuh. Surgeon: Do you have any questions? Me: Mhuh. Surgeon: Don't forget to pick up the prescription on your way out. Me: Mhuuh. Surgeon: Pleasure to meet you. Have a good day. Me: Mhuuhuhuh. I also didn't have time to consider beforehand that I wasn't going to be able to talk right after that. It is much harder to communicate through grunts and gestures than I thought. Me: Mheruhh Marc: What? Ummm. Me: Mheruuh :gestures towards mouth: Marc: ? Me: Gaw. :pulls out phone, type type type type: When can I switch bandages? Marc: Ohhh. I think I'll be communicating exclusively through text for a few more hours. Or whenever the bleeding stops. Jaw and lips are still way too numb, if I try to talk blood will surely start trickling down my mouth like I'm a walker. This might disturb some people. Well, I'll go back to swallowing my own blood. Hope you're all having a wonderful Monday. The sequel to A New Wisdom, The Wisdom Strikes Back, premières on the 10th of May.
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Recent Updated: 1 month ago - Created by Joana Carinhas - View
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breaking bad 5-3
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breaking bad 5-2
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breaking bad 5-1
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